Letting off some steam!

Its probably not a good time to post since I'm super moody, irritable, and tired, but here goes it anyway...
Today, I'm just feeling BLAH. I started taking Vitex/Chasteberry last week and so far I think its working. I finally started my irregualar period 3 days after taking it. Bad news is... I feel like crap. Contraction like cramps, headaches, nauseated, and super emotional, okay bitchy! lol (Don't tell my husband I admitted that!) Good news is... I think its doing its job. I can literally feel my ovaries aching like they are trying to get back into the swing of things. ;) Hopefully its works and I ovulate and get pregnant soon. This trying business SUCKS!
Maybe bloated should go in the first paragraph, but I can't decide if its my period or I'm just fat. Seriously, I feel like I've gained some weight and from pictures recently I think I really might have. The scale disagrees, thank God, but I just feel mad at myself for it. I've been really bad about sticking to any kind of diet and exercising. I could go on with excuses like I'm too busy (which I really feel like I am), but mostly it comes down to I'm lazy, tired, and more than anything haven't cared because I thought I'd be pregnant by now. Bad, I know because I should exercise and be healthy even-more-so being pregnant or wanting to be. Ughhhh I keep finding myself apologizing to Joey because he's lost so much weight & looks GREAT then here's his chubby wife. I always say one more baby then its "me time" & I'm getting into shape. I really mean that!
School is a pain. I HATE math with a passion and pre calculus is just HARD & time consuming. I have actually done pretty good so far... 100 on all homework & quizzes, 88% on my first test (don't judge, thats a good math test grade for me). I love my online Ethics course, but I feel like I'm so busy with math, work, being a mom and wife, that I end up rushing through it instead of really grasping it & getting to enjoy it. Its easy to do and doesn't take a whole lot of time so I find myself cramming it to get on with other things.
Work is okay... I can't get into details of my job & clients, but lets just say it hasn't been emotionally & mentally easy lately. I took on a new shift so now I'm working Tuesdays along with Mondays & Wednesdays, but its still only 7 hours a week. Totally manageable right? Not really once I add up school & homework time & Grant. I really wish we could afford to have more help with him (like preschool or daycamp/daycare). My mom is back at work since school started & Joey is super busy with work that it comes down to my mother-in-law, who isn't in the best of health, having to watch him the most. She is wonderful & really helps me so much, but I can only put so much on her before it wears her down & she feels sick. Thats the last thing I want so I have to keep it pretty limited. My homework has come down to nap time & bed time which is hard because he refuses nap sometimes & bed time means I'm already tired & its getting late.
The scary thing is I'm feeling like this with one kid, two classes, & a very part time job! Seriously, I don't know how other moms do it!! It makes me really nervous to be in the nursing program with a full load of classes & possibly two kids! We will definately have some re-evaluating to do when that time comes!! Ahhhh
This Saturday I'm having a Scentsy party. I've been wanting to get a few things & so has family & friends so I figured why not! I also thought it'd be a good excuse to have a night of fun with friends. Hopefully it will be just that & not a complete flop. I'm making it simple with appetizer type stuff, but it still means the house needs cleaned & homework needs done ahead of time...
Sorry if this sounds like I'm a downer! Just needed to vent a little. I know things could be SOOO worse & I have it REALLY good. Stress just gets me & PMS doesn't help it. ;)